Water – rain – droplets on my face peeking out the window, lost in my own thoughts…..the rain and the thunder – an epitome of the tense rumblings of my own heart…..You in the distance, caved in a building, while I sit here, looking out the window, droplets on my face and cheeks…..thinking about your face and cheeks!!
My lips still carry the softness of your skin, every time I touch it! The unusual February rain reminding me of you – your words, your eyes, your smile….while you sit miles away by yourself!
All those songs I listened to all day, play in my head, reawakening me to the joys of being in love…..the love I always found subdued in me, the love I found most hard to find and accept, the love I’m willing to give a chance to, the love of a girl falling for you like these raindrops falling to the ground outside!
That breath of fresh air which you, my darling, bring with you every time you come; those moments of tenderness which you always give to me, blissfully unaware of how it affects my heart so much, I can’t possibly tell you ever! But I know that you know! At least, I know you that well!
Despair fills my heart when I think about us, the future, the moments that might never come back, the memories which might haunt us like spirits – about not being just a part of each other’s lives – about losing you……and that’s why I refrain from thinking, from planning, from pushing too much, from rushing too far.
The sky seems clear now, the birds fly by. But the sky above my window, right above my eyes is still pouring out raindrops. They don’t touch me anymore, but I can still see them with naked eyes – a reflection of the longing of my naked soul…..before the naked body can follow!
The rains stop, but the rumblings continue…..just like my own heart, which longs for you, then blushes at the sight of you, fearing you might run away and I might suffer like hell, yet again!
Pining, longing, fearing, receding, yet getting closer…..in body….and in heart!!!